Kourtney
Khloe
Kim
Rob
Kendall
Kylie.
You know their names. You know their faces. You probably even know who they've dated. Who they've hated. Who they've loved. Who they still actively hate or love or keep around or love to hate.
You definitely know their momager Kris. You probably know Bruce and North and P and Mace and Chy and Stormi and dream and Saint and…
*record scratch!*
What's up my good person or bad people or non-people or some people (definitely keeping this intro forever 🙂) welcome to another episode of in cursive letters where we (translation: I) talk about pretty much everything.
Last week was a deep dive into the reality TV show dance moms (here's the LINK) today it's all about the Kardashians. Why we love them. Why we hate them. Why we hate to love them. Why we love to hate them.
Everything will be discussed here but first like (almost) every other time
ORIGIN STORY!
I'm not sure but I think I started watching Keeping up in 2014. I kinda remember this because I was eleven. My life was changing. I just got into secondary school (high school. My mom got us GoTv for the first time. Life was exciting with all those amazing channels to pick from.
I remember bing watching shows with my siblings after we were sure my mom had fallen asleep and then getting in trouble for staying up late on school nights.
I remember my brothers being team SpongeBob (Nickelodeon) and WWE Wrestling (that was the family's classic! If there was ever an an argument about what TV. Show to watch, WWE always won. Now it's all watered down *sigh*)
Anyway, for my brothers SpongeBob and Wrestling (everyone lowkey).
My sister did not really care about TV stations. She'd watch whatever but when her 11pm telenovelas come on? You better just hand her the remote!
My mom and I were the aliens.
You see everybody in the house had no problem with each person liked. They saw reasoning in each other's choices, even validated it but when it came to my mom and I…they could not understand why we enjoyed wanting people live their lives. They thought something had to be wrong with us who being creepy people who watched people.
We did not care though. I was especially happy because for the first time in my entire life my mom and i were on the same teams, fighting the same fight, liking the same thing.
My mom and I are like oil and water. If she goes left, I go right. If she hates something, chances are, I'll be obsessed with it. If she loves something, I'll loathe it.
In fact, my mantra to my sister (when she goes out with my mom and they maybe want to buy clothes or something for me) is to pick the one my mom hates the most and never pick the ones she likes. It works everytime. Without even knowing that she hates it, I naturally gravitate towards it.
However, the two things my mom and I agree on are: reality TV shows and fashion. We can spend hours watching and critiquing runway looks (even though we will both be at the extreme end of the two spectrum).
Keeping up was our holy grail. Where we bury the hatchet and agree that we might actually be related.
INTRODUCING THE Ks
Okay so there are five sisters: three Kardashians and two Jenners.
So basically Kris Jenner there mom had three girls (Kim, Kourtney and Khloe) with Robert Kardashians, a successful lawyer who got more popular for the infamous OJ Simpson's case.
Kris and Robert got a divorce and then there was Bruce who was a successful athlete at the time.
Bruce and Bruce got married and had two more girls: Kendall and Kylie; the Jenners.
Anyway, the Jenners and the Kardashians started in 2007 called keeping up with the Kardashians, basically, they are all Kardashians.
Now let's MEET THE GIRLS:
So this is Kim (Kim Kardashian), the sister who started it all with the infamous sex tape. There always this debate about if the Kardashians would be anything without Kim's tape. To be honest, I feel like they would have found their footing in Hollywood regardless.
I feel like Kim would have been the controversial figure we love to hate regardless.
She has always wanted (lowkey desperately) to be famous (which I don't necessarily think is a bad thing).
She started by hanging around Paris Hilton during her rebellion era. She worked as Brandy's assistant. She was always celebrity adjacent. Always pushed to the back while the paparazzi took pictures of her famous friend.
Kim Kardashian would have been the Kim we know today with or without the sex tape. Without the tape, she would found another controversial way to get people talking. There was no way she was going to settle for being obscure. It was so obvious from the beginning of the show.
In typecasting/ stereotyping the girl. Kim is the resident Diva (🎶 na na na Diva is the female version of a husler🎶 sorry, I couldn't stop myself 🙃).
Who remembers “Kim, stop taking pictures! Your sister's going to jail!” That was such a moment.
Then there's KOURTNEY
Kourtney is the monotone Lemme chill babe. She's unbothered, lowkey Condescending. Very health conscious. Very “Kim there's people dying!” Very “it's not about having money for WiFi. It's about the Earth and radiation.” Also very “Kim, I'll fuck you up” when pushed.
Kourtney is the stereotypical clean Zen girlie who takes healthy juices, does a lot of therapy and yoga and palates and looks down on people who don't live like her.
The problem with Kourt is not that she lives the way she does (to each their own). The problem is she thinks everybody (all her sisters) should live like her.
I don't think she realized how judgy she can be sometimes and how her condescension can sometimes suck the joy out of things.
After Kim was my favorite for like the first season, after I got over the whole Kim Kardashian effect, Kourtney became my favorite. I really liked her vibe: very zen, very unbothered, very que Sera Sera but then the condescending Judgy attitude ruined everything.
Then Khloe became (and stayed) my favorite.
Anyway, yeah, Kourtney is the resident “lemme chill” babe…with a touch of condescending Judginess.
Now let's move on to everybody’s favorite Kardashian:
KHLOE KARDASHIAN
Khloe…Khloe is just a breath of fresh air. She's beautiful (they are all beautiful), she's witty, has funny amazing comebacks. She's the most realistic. The most human. Things she does seem very natural, it does not feel forced or practical and that's the Khloe allure.
She's obviously a bit more measured and controlled now (she has to be. They are way more famous and targeted than they were when they started) but even now people feel like she's still human.
Khloe is just the coolest, I don't know what else to tell you. She's also really kind and loving. I feel like she's the glue that keeps the family together.
I'll say she's the resident cool-fun loving sister.
Next there's KENDALL JENNER
Immediately the mysterious middle child even though she's not even the middle child. Wait let's child. So: Kourtney, Kim, Khloe, Rob, Kendall and Kylie. Yeahhhh she's not but she gives middle child vibes though. I'm a middle child so I would know but to put the rest of you on game, let's do:
THE REALITY OF A BONA-FIDE MIDDLE CHILD.
Always left out of things because they genuinely forget that you exist on most days because your position in the family is not that important. Your not the oldest to be yelled at or the youngest to be cuddles so… yeah.
In the Kardashians case though, I think the “always left out one” is definitely Kylie. Nah…I don't think. They tell Kylie things she just does not show up.
Yeahhhh I actually think it's Kendall. I can vividly recall a few clips where she did not know something happened because no one told her. I can almost hear her being like “why did no one tell me that was happening?!” But yet again I think it's because she does not check the family's group chat.
Anyhoo, next dilemma of a middle child. This is not really a dilemma. I actually like it. You're kinda allowed to do whatever from a young age because nobody really cares what you do. They have the older kids and younger ones to worry about.
I'm not sure this really pertains to Kendall though but I can definitely see her just shoved into her room allowed to do whatever as a kid. But I think it's more of a Kendall and Kylie thing though since they were the overlooked lastborns.
The next ones are really just: being invisible hence finding the joy in obscurity (I think Kendall has this) and needing less coddling then the rest of your siblings (being more hard-core because the middle sibling is the most misunderstood because no one actually took the time out to really know them!... sorry that came from a really real place.)
So yeah, it's misunderstood middle child for Kendall.
Next!
KYLIE
Kylie Jenner is the fun goofy baby sister that everybody in the family is obsessed with. At the beginning of the show, Kendall and Kylie were hardly seen but the little we saw of Kylie just show how fun she is.
There was this clip: the pole clip when Bruce got made ‘cos Kim put up a stripper pole in her room and Kylie was twirling on it.
That was so funny.
There was also the scene where the sisters were teaching Kendall about periods and the menstrual cycle because she started her period. Kendall was visibly uncomfortable while Kylie was just being Kylie.
Honestly, Kylie is the coolest. My favorite sorta Kardashian spinoff is life of Kylie. I was obsessed with her and Jordyn's friendship but anyway…
MOST ICONIC KARDASHIAN/ JENNER DUO?
In every family there are usually those two inseparable siblings. There's alway that sibling that each sibling likes the most (even though we don't always say it). Min is my sister. Luckily, I only have one (and she only has one) so no competition on this end.
Amongst the Kardashian/ Jenner duos which pair is the most iconic? Let's find out!
So at first there was KHLOE AND KOURTNEY
Kourtney and Khloe were the most iconic duo when the show started. The lore is simple, Kim, the major superstar in the family was getting all their mom's attention so Khloe and Kourtney got closer.
Khloe and Kourtney's friendship was really fun. It was balanced, like a yin and yang kind of thing. Where Kourtney was strict and a bit obsessive, Khloe could let lose and be normal and throw her older sister into a delivery box and push it around the house (that was so funny when it happened. I think it happened a lot too).
The honorary member of that duo was Scott Disick. So often times, it was Scott, Kourtney and Khloe.
Side note: Khloe and Scott were (are?) a lethal combo.
The next duo.
After the Khloe and Kourtney love affair ended, it became (Still is) KIM AND KHLOE
Personally, I prefer the Kourtney and Khloe combo to the Kim and Khloe but they are still fun together. Just a lot more similar and settled while is good. They're all grown up so settled is good.
How do I explain this? The Kim and Khloe combo gives grown. Sipping wine in the kitchen kinda grown. Organizing dinner parties in the lawn typa grow while the Kourtney and Khloe combo was more chaotic and fun.
Next!
KENDALL AND KYLIE
There's no doubt that this is the most iconic duo amongst the Kardashian/ Jenner clan. They grew up together, navigated being on a widely broadcasted TV show very young together, learned what fame is (very young) and how to navigate it together.
They basically figured their unusual lives out together. Kendall and Kylie just give major sister vibes. Whenever Kendall talks about Kylie you can tell that she loves her (not so) little sister very much.
I really like their closeness so yeah the crown of ULTIMATE KARDASHIAN/ JENNER DUO goes to KENDALL AND KYLIE.
An honorary mention is Kylie and Khloe:
When they were younger, when the show just began, Kylie was almost always around Khloe. She was so close to Khloe and so yeah, I also really the Khloe- Kylie duo-ship.
FAVORITE KARDASHIAN/ JENNER
I have liked every single one of them at different times of my life. Kim was at the beginning of the show (12-13 ish). Kourtney was next (puberty era 16 ish). Then Kylie and Khloe (16-17. Around the time I started watching the life of Kylie). Then Khloe. Then Khloe and Kendall. Now Khloe…and everyone.
So yeah guys,
That's the end of this article,
Thank you so much for reading,
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!